Catholic Soup is a food for thought blog based website designed to provide Catholic insight through personal experience.

Thursday, June 30, 2011

Back on my Knees

Today, for the first time in a really long time I knelt down to pray. Over the past few months it seemed like I forgot how soothing it was to the soul. I never prayed before I went to sleep, I didn't pray on my knees when I woke up. I would always skip right over it, like it was a CD or something. The CD would play but when it came to a song that I didn't like, all it took was one single act to skip right over it and go right on to the next. But, that's what I did, never cared too much about praying on my knees.
My father called the family down from upstairs, as we each gathered in the hallway, we walked closer to the distant voice we heard coming from the back room. He called us into the master bedroom, got down on his knees and said "we need to pray". As I hesitated, for a second, a cover of amazement sheltered over my body and I dropped to my knees. As I closed my eyes to the prayer, I felt relieved, so relaxed, It felt like I was being held, everything was comfortable again. I realized that I had been gone from prayer for so long, so long that I had forgotten about that peace it brings not only to pray, but praying on my knees. I knelt there, with my body hunched over on the bed. My elbows propped me up while my hands were covering my face. I stayed there, humbled, attracted, and in pity. I mumbled, I'm sorry over and over again. I was going lost, and Christ voice attracts. God, I need you, I'm nothing without you, bring me back to you, If I don't make it through, I need you. I love you

Monday, June 13, 2011

Ranchos de Taos

I went to Taos, New Mexico this weekend. The same trip that had a profound impact on my life 4 years ago. We went to remud the Mission of Saint Francis of Assisi. There, I would witness the Holy Spirit just putting all sorts off things together for me. How I met different people, the scriptures that I received, it was amazing how everything seemed to tie all together. I went to sleep everyday getting closet and closer to the thought of not being afraid. Afraid of being who God really wants me to be. Afraid of just losing everything that God has given me by throwing it away by one simple wrong decision. I got off the bus onto the parking lot of my home parish knowing that Christ will always be with us, he will never leave us. That we should never be afraid because Christ is our Guide. My rock was "Guidance"